I want to share something small but important that happened today. It’s Taylor Swift’s birthday, and my wife and one of our friends are huge fans. So today we went to a Taylor-themed bingo event. Nothing big. Nothing dramatic. Just a couple of hours doing something they love. But here’s the part that matters: A year ago, I wouldn’t have gone. Not because I didn’t want to or care. But because the voice in my head… the one I call Gerald… would’ve been loud as hell. And to be clear… that voice...
1 day ago • 2 min read
I want to share something honestly. Over the last few days, I’ve had real conversations with women inside this space. And alongside reflecting on my own journey, something became painfully clear: Thirty days was never going to be enough. Not because the work is shallow. But because survival mode runs deep. Survival mode isn’t a habit. It’s not a mindset issue. It’s not something you push through with discipline. It’s an identity you learned to live from. And identities don’t unwind on a...
2 days ago • 2 min read
Yesterday, I told you about the identities I didn’t even know were running my life. The quiet one. The strong one. The one who didn’t take up space. The one who carried everyone else. But there’s another part of this that I’ve never shared publicly. I wasn’t just clinging to trauma identities… I was clinging to diagnosis identities, too. Anxiety. “Broken.” “Unfixable.” Depression. “Wired this way.” Treatment-resistant. Chemical imbalance. Those words didn’t just describe what I was feeling....
3 days ago • 1 min read
Yesterday, I told you the truth I wish someone had told me years ago: You’re not stuck because you’re broken. You’re stuck because your identity is still wired for survival. And today… that truth hits even deeper. Because today is my wife’s and my third wedding anniversary. And honestly? It still blows my mind that this is my life. Five years ago, I never believed I would have a relationship like the one I have now. Back then, my survival identity ran everything: It told me I wasn’t worthy of...
5 days ago • 2 min read
I need to share something with you today that I wish someone had said to me years ago. It would have saved me so much pain. So much spiraling. So many years of feeling like I was failing at a life I was trying so hard to rebuild. Here it is: You’re not stuck because you’re broken. You’re stuck because your identity is still wired for survival. No one ever taught us this. We grew up thinking that: motivation would fix it journaling would fix it a new routine would fix it therapy alone would...
6 days ago • 1 min read
I've noticed something. In my own journey and in the women I've worked with, the same three patterns keep showing up. Not surface-level stuff like "I need better boundaries" or "I should stop people-pleasing." The deeper patterns. The ones running the show behind the scenes. And I want to share them with you because once you SEE them, you can't unsee them. PATTERN 1: The "I'll Start When" Loop You tell yourself: "I'll set boundaries when things calm down" "I'll choose myself when I have more...
7 days ago • 1 min read
It's January 3rd, 2026. Your partner says something that normally would set you off. But this time? You pause. You feel the reaction rising... and you let it pass. You respond calmly. Or you don't respond at all. Your mom calls, asking you to host dinner. In the past, you'd say yes while screaming inside. But today? You check in with yourself first. You answer clearly, kindly, without explanation or guilt. Your boundaries are no longer negotiable. Later, you feel overwhelmed. Kids are loud....
10 days ago • 1 min read
Something clicked for me on this trip. Not in a gentle way. Not in a “journal and feel inspired” way. More like a wake the hell up moment. I realized something about myself that I know you’re going to relate to: I keep saying I want a different life… while still reacting like the version of me I’ve been trying to outgrow. I still lose my temper over small shit when I’m overwhelmed. I still shrink myself around people who drain me. I still avoid setting boundaries in places where I know I’m...
13 days ago • 1 min read
Something hit me tonight that I have never really said out loud: There is a version of you that shows up even when you don’t feel like it. And that version? That is the one that will change your life. Not the motivated you. Not the inspired you. Not the “I feel amazing today” you. The tired you. The worn-down you. The “I don’t feel good but I’m still here” you. That version is the one building your future. I took it easy today. I am exhausted. I am going to bed early because my body is over...
14 days ago • 1 min read